Some Don’t Like It HOT

After years of hair-tearing frustration with the crap cable, and even crapper customer, ‘service’ provided by HOT – see HOT . . . in the bedroom and under the collar and Nimas Lee: An open letter to HOT – I am finally, following numerous broken promises (to myself), doing something to disengage from the bastards: I am connecting my newly renovated apartment with HOT’s satellite competitor, yes.

I had, originally, again ordered HOT – a technician was due at the apartment last Tuesday – because, as well as being reactionary (I still use a paper diary), it offers a convenient television/internet/telephony “triple”, I am used to navigating its TV channels, and can rarely pass up on a deal (it is currently running a Samsung Tablet promotion).

But after receiving, in the days following the order, half a dozen calls from HOT customer service incompetents enquiring why I hadn’t yet ordered, and then a chance, elated call from a friend, Hanna, who had just switched to yes, I decided to follow her lead . . .

I called HOT on two separate occasions to cancel the order, but neither “Linoy” nor “Mohammed” could locate it against my name, address, telephone or ID numbers. And, entirely true to form, on Tuesday afternoon – the day on which the technician would have been due – I received an sms informing me that one would be visiting the following (i.e., Wednesday) afternoon! I called once more to cancel . . . but “Oshrit”, too, could not find any record of the order in HOT’s ‘system’.

There is clearly, however, some communication at HOT – at least when they are about to lose another 300-plus-shekel-a-month customer – because, early on Wednesday morning, Natanel, the sales rep who had closed the original order, called to enquire why I didn’t wish to proceed with it.

“If you are asking,” I said, “I will tell you.” And I proceeded to recite my HOT list . . .

  • HOT’s automated system still, after six years, doesn’t recognise my telephone number (and I don’t even mention Robert Lee);
  • HOT’s customer service reps are still convinced that I live on Melchett, even though I sold my apartment there six months ago;
  • I live at number 4, not at number 10 (in the same way that, on Melchett, I lived at 31, not 3);
  • Natanel had not disclosed, in his original call to me, the 300 shekel connection fee;
  • I became thoroughly pissed off by the multiple, misinformed calls after the order had already been closed;
  • none of HOT’s customer service reps could find evidence of the order; and
  • even the day agreed for it was wrongly recorded.

Natanel’s response? To tell me that my complaints were nekudatiyot me’od (highly specific), that I shouldn’t be so quick to anger, and, wait for it . . . to ask: “Aren’t you grateful to HOT when watching television programmes that you enjoy?”

I replied that I did very much enjoy the English football, but that I could also watch that on yes. And, ignoring his second point (which may actually have some validity), I once again went through my HOT list.

“It is one hundred percent impossible,” said Natanel, “that a rep could not find the new order.”

“Well, it is one hundred percent something,” I replied, “because three out of three couldn’t!”

And, while I could not disagree with Natanel’s contention that no customer service is perfect, I informed him that HOT’s was by far and away the worst that I have ever had the misfortune to experience, even in Israel, with not a single call passing without some degree – usually a high one – of irritation, aggravation and/or annoyance.

With a sigh of resignation, the admirably persistent (and intelligent, for a HOT employee) salesman enquired, “Is there anything I can say that will make you change your mind?”

“No,” I replied – knowing that HOT would never agree to the free month/s that sprang to mind – with no little satisfaction . . . and, with which, Natanel abruptly terminated the call.

And while not kidding myself that there won’t also be “issues” with yes, deserting HOT has accorded me, after the many frustrating years of having to deal with it, both much-needed therapy and sweetish revenge.


22 responses to “Some Don’t Like It HOT

  1. Yes…yes….yes!!!
    I haven’t had a moment’s hassle with YES in the 5 years I’ve subscribed to their service.
    Cell phone companies in Israel?
    Now that’s a different story.
    Even getting a mortgage in Israel paled in comparison to trying to close my Cellcom contract.
    Wishing you and YES a happy union…you may not yet be lucky in love but at least you can stay home and watch great telly!

  2. I hate HOT more than any other company in the universe (a close second is Netvision)… however, I made the break about 2 years ago after a stormy 10 year relationship with them (which included them sending me flowers to persuade me not to leave after one of their reps insulted me)… I now have a non Israeli satellite – it is not that great – since it gets stuck – but that is good, because the kids don’t watch too much TV that way.

    HOT also could not grasp the fact that I had moved, and continued to send technicians to the old apartment – despite the fact that they had reconnected me in my new house. They would call me and complain that I was not home at the appointed time, and at the same time, I would be on the other line, trying to find out where the hell they were.

  3. On customer service at least you don’t have to worry about some guy called “Brian” from Bombay trying to ‘help’.

    Unless there’s no other way to watch Hebrew channels I recommend just ditch HOT and YES and pay £5 a month for a proxy server link into the UK. Then get “tvcatchup” free by using your computer/laptop as a settop box plugged into your TV with 50 free uk terrestrial channels inc BBC ITV etc and if you want sky sports for free log onto the many p2p channels. Eg for yesterday’s MUFC Chelsea game enter “p2p man utd Chelsea” into google. otherwise pay for sky as a UK customer using the proxy server log in. The whole thing will cost much less than half the 300 shekels you are paying and no awful customer service. The money you are saving can be used to take out one more date per week…

  4. Only 5 quid for a prozy server? That’s Thailand prices!

  5. 50 free uk terrestrial channels for 5 pounds!

    When George VI died 60 years ago today you got BBC TV, the Home Service, the Light Programme and the Third Programme for 2 quid per year – and there was probably more entertainment than in all those 50 channels put together.

  6. And the ever modest Mr. Fisher omits to mention that you can also read about tax – though with a twist – for gornisht on his new(ish) blog . . .

  7. Charles Philip Lehrer

    Had a problem with HOT today. Listened to a wonderfully American accented recording, describing all the alternative possible services offered by the Company (??????), so decided ,for once to go for the English speaking technician who would be able to assist me, as I never found the Hebrew speakers very effective. To cut a long story short, I spoke to 18, yes 18 technicians (14 if you count the repeats), NONE of whom had any inkling of “La langue de Shakespeare”, and each one of whom, kept passing me on to the next guy or gal, like a HOT potato. I was screaming at them (in Hebrew), to no avail, as HOT, always go for the cheapest solution, only hiring Russian, Amharic or Arabic speakers, so as to keep paying the minimum wage.

    Is there anything in Israel like a consumer protection agency or an Ombudsman? I fully understand the social revolt taking place, as the level of Faginism (have I coined a new word?) and TOTAL amateurism only goes to show what a LEVANTINE country this really is. A company like HOT, should BE CLOSED DOWN, or the owners should be sent back to school and taught that PROFIT is NOT the only motive. I dread to think what the EHUD BARAKS OF THIS COUNTRY have in store for us, if the IDF (and I`ve already been there), are as amateuristic as the civilian sector, because there are more companies like HOT, being run by other mediocre talents. More about THAT next time.

    By the way,even the venerable Jerusalem Post, has been offering 41NIS/Hour, for employment at its call-centre for at LEAST the past 5 years. Has nobody except the bloody banks and building companies EVER heard of INDEXATION?

  8. Can’t even count the number of times we’ve “decided” to get rid of HOT – the last time being about a month ago when we were without any TV for over a week because they only come to the Gush twice a week up till 5pm and that week’s appointments were all booked! But we never go through with it, cos we find it hard to believe that we’ll have any less aggro with any other provider!

    Good luck with YES Mike – keep us posted, and if it all goes smoothly, perhaps we’ll finally make the move too!

  9. Ian Ronald Bell

    The only problem with Yes is that you then have to deal with the worst of them all … Bezeq

  10. Pray tell, IRB . . . they are coming next week!

  11. You might also add that HOT only shows movies that have been out 3 or 4 years at least and that if you want anything more up-to-date, they have the infernal chutzpa to expect you to pay extra for HOT VOD!

    I think it’s only the force of inertia that has stopped me from moving to YES…

  12. Re the Samsung Tablet promotion, I have just seen this . . .

    Here is the offending ad, with subtitles (it starts at 0:49) . . .

    Finally, HOT does something right!

  13. Ian Ronald Bell

    Bezeq — Try and imagine BT, but with added Israelis

  14. You can’t believe it . . .

    I just this second had another call from HOT, asking me about my new installation on the 15th. I told the cretin that I hadn’t arranged a new installation for the 15th, and had cancelled the one due for last week.

    She asked if I might, anyway, be interested in a new installation. I told her not. She enquired why.

    “Because of HOT’s shit customer service,” I said.

    She then asked if it was anything in particular.

    “Yes,” I replied, “calls like this!”

  15. OK, so I tried posting last week, and due to various technical glitches, didn’t quite manage to accomplish my mission. All of which only proves that God is on the side of the TrollMamma, as will become apparent as I continue.

    Firstly, I add my voices to those who extoll Yes. Yes are amazing. I ditched HOT over ten years ago and have never looked back. I’d rather deal with human beings who know the difference between an arse and an elbow, and lose out on VOD, or the triple, quite frankly (thank god for spellcheck, that was nearly “VOD or the tripe”. The mind boggles.)

    Secondly, clearly it was Karma that prevented me from commenting last week, as I had the opportunity, for the first time in a long time, to have to call Yes customer service this morning — yes, Shabbat morning, and yes, I am a heathen. Last night, as I sat in singular mong-out mode, just as the show that I was watching finished, my “memir” suddenly refused to broadcast anything but blackness. Frustrating at the best of times, but even more so, knowing that I had done nothing but watch the box, slumped in my easy chair in a post-Friday night dinner stupor, and had in no way caused this sudden attack of TV noir. I decided, somewhat irrationally, that the memir was obviously tired, and needed to sleep it off in order to awaken refreshed and raring to go the following morning, and sloped off to bed, only to be woken far too early on a Shabbat by one of my progeny, demanding to know why the TV had fallen silent.

    Resigning myself o the inevitable, I called Yes customer support. I sat through the inevitable adverts until i got a human support person — a wait of something between 2-4 minutes, which is not bad, especially for a Shabbos morning. The guy was polite, helpful, in no way insinuated that I was a complete moron for managing to psych my memir into misbehaviour (the attitude of HOT as I recall: “What do you mean it’s just stopped working? YOU must have DONE something to it. Moron.”) and gently helped me fix it.

    If that doesn’t convince you that you were right in the first place — albeit that you didn’t seem to need much convincing — nothing will. Happy happy, and a gutte shabbes.

    TM x

    PS Karma, God — they all have the same zip code. 🙂

  16. Not a good start . . .

    yes customer service had checked my address and informed me that it already had a dish.

    But, because I trust no one here, I went up on the roof of the building to check for myself. No dish.

    I called yes to pass on the news. “No problem,” they said. Their technician would install a dish.

    The twat arrived yesterday . . . yes, you guessed it, with no idea that there was no dish! And it is a “different team”, of course, that puts them up.

    Will keep you posted . . .

  17. Funny, true, and – most importantly, of course – hot (with a small “h”) . . .

  18. I think you should date someone from Hot, it would solve everything for you. Someone stupid enough to date you and someone who could fix your installation? It will end Hot and Dating blogs as well.

  19. Charles Philip Lehrer

    I think you`re right Bruno, except for the fact that I really enjoy reading the adventures of Mike on the dating blogs, as well as empathizing with him, for all his woes with those HOT buggers and the native MILFs

  20. Almost choked on my beer (“Happy Hour” naturally) just now, reading the following e-mail, sent by an English friend – new to the delights of Israeli customer service – to HOT . . .

    “I intend issuing proceedings for inconvenience and special damages.

    I have previously advised HOT call centre staff that every email sent to you and every call to you will be discoverable and we will seek to prove, inter alia, that standard of continuity of service has been so slow that on that basis your company are not fit to run an internet service.

    Your technician attended for an appointment here between 9 and 11, changed some parts and blamed the dropped signal, which is a nightly occurence, on corroded coaxial cable plugs. We have at least seven service visits since pesach and your people have changed the box supplied by you five times.

    In previous discussions you have told me that you have sent a top technician so as to find out the problem is. I have relied on this falsity to my disadvantages and intend therefore alleging fraudulent misrepresentation with a view to achieving pecuniary advantage.”

    “A top technician”! 😉

    I can just imagine the moron at HOT who received this e-mail asking his more moronic (he/she will have been there for longer) team leader about “the applicability and extent of, inter alia, special damages if fraudulent misrepresentation with a view to achieving pecuniary advantage is, indeed, proven”!!

  21. Charles Philip Lehrer

    They`re too bloody illiterate to understand. What all unsatisfied customers should do is, as in America, start a class-action suit against the OLIGARCHIC OWNERS of HOT, for FRAUD and misrepresentation. However, the “great local unwashed”, who think HOT is doing an excellent job, will then, as their recurring theme chant of “Yihye Tov” goes to show, attack the “Inglizim”, for having “DISRUPTED” their viewing “PLEASURE”.

  22. Pingback: Anglo Protekzia - saving you from Israeli service providers - Hacking Aliyah | Hacking Aliyah

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